sad but true

Think of me while I’m in this long work stretch…

You might be an ER nurse if -

Discussing dismemberment over a gourmet meal seems perfectly normal to you
You have the bladder capacity of five people and the flat feet of Fred Flintstone
You can identify the positive teeth to tattoo ratio
You believe in aerial spraying of Prozac
You disbelieve 90% of what you are told and 75% of what you see
You say “great veins” when looking at a total stranger
Your favorite hallucinogenic is exhaustion
You think caffeine should be available in IV form
You have ever restrained someone and it was not a sexual experience
Your idea of gambling is an alcohol level pool instead of a football pool
Your immune system is so well developed that it has been known to attack squirrels in the backyard
You’ve ever had a patient with a nose ring, a tongue ring and a pierced eyebrow tell you they were afraid of shots

And my personal favorite…

You might be an ER nurse if your shoes have ever been seized and quarantined by either the Centers for Disease Control, OSHA, the EPA or the Nuclear Regulatory Commission