Monday, July 14, 2008

fill in the blank


Unfortunately, quite a lot of my butt got left at work tonight when it got chewed off - big chunks at a time. On the plus side, when I go back first thing tomorrow, they should still be laying around - slightly gnawed on but basically alright. If I remember to buy super glue on the way in I should be okay.


The bottom line here is that I am a woman without a post. I am, however, in hot negotiations to bring something so different, so raw, so...vaguely disturbing to you that you will cry genuine tears of delight when you see it. I'd appreciate any mojo you'd care to throw my way as I delicately try to bag my target. Just don't throw it at my butt. It's seen better days.


So here's the plan for today. Let's play Finish The Sentence. Ready?


I would be an absolutely perfect human being if it wasn't for....



And my answer would be...my temper. It has sunk me more than once. Of course, I can be a little intestinally challenged, too. Hmm. Tough call. Maybe losing half my butt will help.


What keeps you from being flawless?

20 comments:

ped crossing said...

I would be am absolutely perfect human being if it wasn't for my migraines. They take too much energy and keep me from being mom, teacher, wife and amazing human I am meant to be.

Sorry you had such a rough day. Let's hope tomorrow is better.

I could have put stubborn, but I have too much control of that one. And I would like to believe that my personality is perfect. I am delusional and I know it and I have no problem with it.

Maggie May said...

I think that "ped crossing"'s answer could also be mine! So I will just write ditto!

Pam said...

if i didn't have thyroid disease and the scorpio temper! maybe throw in: if i didn't get stressed so easily. lol

belle said...

What?? You mean I am not an absolutely perfect human being?? Wow, break it to me gently RC :) Hmm, let's think now ... ok, I would be an absolutely perfect human being if it weren't for my humility. Hee hee hee :D

Anonymous said...

What keeps me from being flawless...hahha My Kids!!!
too bad on the butt thing!!

Rose said...

I would be an absolutely perfect person it wasn't for my lack of patience. And my perfectionist tendencies. And my . . .

This is tongue in cheek, right?

Anonymous said...

were it not for my absolute love of procrastination.

Kim said...

Hmmm.

I would be an absolutely perfect human being if it weren't for my stubborn tendencies. Or maybe my temper. Or that sarcastic streak. Oh, wait, maybe I'd be perfect if pigs could fly. Yeah. That's it.

Amy said...

I would be absolutely perfect if it weren't for absolutely everything. Geez. What a demoralizing post. ;)

I hope your ass heals quickly.

Anonymous said...

A perfect human being, maybe one day, but for now, I'll settle for being me.

CJ xx

Potty Mummy said...

I would be absolutely perfect if I could maintain focus and finish things...

(Excuse me, I'll get back to this but must just quickly empty the dishwasher first).

laurie said...

so what did you do at work that go you in trouble?

inquiring minds want to know.

Rudee said...

I want to know what you did too? Did you tell some charming patient what you really think? Better yet, did you do that to a surgeon?

Don't worry about your butt. It's all behind you now.

BTW, I'd be a different person if I'd been born with a bank account that matched my shopping appetites.

Stacie said...

My fear/lack of confidence keeps me from being flawless.

I am working on it though!

Jen said...

...for my love of trashy fashion magazines and my tendency to bottle up anger. Other than that, I'm perfect.

Wait, what do you mean I'm not perfect? How dare you?!?!

As for your butt, not only do Spanx work for shaping, I hear they're great for holding bits on, too. :)

Cath said...

Flawless?
Moi?
I wish.

Devon said...

I would be a perfect human if... all things declaring or demanding perfection didn't annoy the hell out of me!

Nearlydawn said...

I would be am absolutely perfect human being if it wasn't for my tendency to talk way the hell too much.

I know I do it, but I really can't seem to do much about it.

Oh, my temper is a close 2nd.

Nearlydawn said...

btw - tomorrow is likely to be my bad day.

I kinda threw my boss under the bus. He's likely to live, but he won't be happy with me once he recovers. Doh!

Jill said...

iwbaaphbiiwfm FEAR!