Friday, April 18, 2008

ding ding ding

Round One went to Gumby. During a running through the house fight with Surfer Dude, he slammed the Dutch door between the dining room and the kitchen on SD's arm, catching it so completely that twenty four hours later SD's arm is still black and blue.


Round Two went to Surfer Dude. While outside at dusk playing a kind of makeshift baseball with a big stick and a tennis ball, he hit Gumby in the eye so hard with a line drive (forehand??) that Gumby came in the house with a swollen shut eye tearing copiously.


Round Three went to the school nurse who got to call me this morning and ask me if I'd noticed that Gumby's pupils were two completely different sizes, and if I didn't think, with all my ER experience, that a doctor's visit would be a good idea.


Round Four went to our doctor who kept us waiting an hour to see him.


Round Five went to the pharmacy, which screwed up his prescription for eye drops so badly that it took two pharmacies, six people and roughly twenty phone calls to straighten out.


The only conceivable winner in any of this was my mother, who avoided my waterworks dropping her off at the airport because I had a kid in the backseat that I had to race to a doctor's appointment. And I know she didn't win, because she had to then wait hours to find out that Gumby's problem was just a pupillary reaction to getting the hell banged out of his eye, and not a concussion or worse.


We really do keep our visitors entertained, as you can see. She had woken up that morning to the startling sound of a Surfer Dude fart so loud, so resounding, that one room over we both started laughing - from a dead sleep. When we say Technical Knock Out in my house, we aren't talking about boxing.

25 comments:

Rudee said...

And you're the ring girl, right? Drop a little xanax in the milk... Sorry your mum had to leave, it sounds like you could still use a helping dozen or so hands around there.

Corey~living and loving said...

oh my word....you have so much on your plate right now.
hugs.

but....it really made for a creative post. at least there is THAT, right?

Maggie May said...

Ohhhhhhhh! Family life.
What would we do with out it! Always a crisis of one sort or another, isn't there? I can relate to it. Glad there was nothing seriously wrong. Sounded worrying.

belle said...

Oh my, that's a day and half!

Mya said...

Have they started lighting their farts yet? If not, there's another visit to ER in your future! I dearly hope NOT.

Mya x

the mother of this lot said...

Oh so familiar....

Janie said...

Good grief, girlfriend! Glad they're okay.

Marti said...

The thing about your post (again) I can see this so clearly in my mind! What would we do if we didn't have our boys around to do the insane things they do??

Sounds like things are getting back to 'normal' - whatever the heck that is...

Hugs,
Marti

Kaytabug said...

Oh mylanta!! Boys are so rough and tough! Glad they are ok. That kind of fun sounds brutal! Boys will be boys though.

I LMAO at the last part. That is what I get to look forward to!

Bitter Sweet Chocolate Irene said...

I hoe you always keep your sense of humor in the calamity department, because truth is stranger than fiction and real life reads like a first hand novel that should get a Booker prize award. I hope you are hanging in there as well as I am, I wish you all the best and many good moments in the day that are whack free.

aims said...

Luckily it was just a reaction to the tennis ball in the eye...my brother has that disease that attacks the pupils...he's forever putting medicated eyedrops in...and his vision can scare him somedays.

Now waking up to a fart like that? Sounds like you could make one of those mastercard commercials...priceless!

MarmiteToasty said...

Sounds pretty normal to me LMFAO.......

Sorry ya having a lot on ya plate at the moment....

x

ped crossing said...

If I have moments like this in my future, I may wish I had girls!

Akelamalu said...

There's never a dull moment with your lot is there? :)

Beckie said...

Never a dull moment at your house!

Nearlydawn said...

LOL! You ALMOST make me want another boy! So in the coming years I can have ring-side seats myself! Ha!

I'm just kidding Lord, really I am... I wouldn't want to jinx myself!

Happy in the Abyss said...

GOD I MISS HAVING YOU GUYS AROUND! And to think that in the same gene pool I have a son who has never had a stitch or broken bones...knocking on wood as we speak.

Swearing Mother said...

Ah, the comedy value of farts.

Priceless.

Potty Mummy said...

Even at 4 and 2 my boys think farts are funny. Who taught them that? I have a right to know...

Joy T. said...

My dog farts like that. Then looks at the closest person to him....which is usually me....as if they did it. Thanks. Sounds like a lot of excitement in your home. Hard to believe one day you're going to miss all that excitement.

ciara said...

well, you can never be accused of not providing your guests with entertainment! lol :) i'm sorry it's going so rough, but it can only get better right??

Eileen said...

I am so glad he did not have a concussion! That is a bright spot in your very lively world. Your stories of your boys remind me of my childhood growing up with 3 brothers, never a dull moment. They were always into something or going after each other. We had so many broken doors, windows, mailboxes, etc. and the ER was like a second home. Now they are all so close and love each other so much now that they are adults.

Sorry that you mom had to leave. Wish she could have stayed with you longer.

Take care of yoursef
XOXO

Jo Beaufoix said...

RC, what a mad day. They sound just like my brothers. One of them got the other in the eye with a stick, but after a week in hospital sat upright with the blood draining away he has perfect vision again thank God.
Hope you're ok.

the planet of janet said...

have you been peeking through my windows?

totally sounds like my boys.

Sandy said...

So glad that your mom wasn't bored...lol.