Monday, May 7, 2007

and the thunder rolls...

We're floating away. Haven't seen the sun since Saturday. (Sing to the tune of Sailing Away for the full impact). It hasn't really stopped raining since Saturday night, and the water is definitely accumulating. Our phone has even been knocked out by the storms. We have no incoming service. Our entire area is under a flood watch and a lot of the counties around us are under flood warnings. For those who are unfamililar with the weather lingo, a watch means something is possible and a warning means it is either likely or already happening. So for a tornado watch we just keep the weather station on and for a warning for our specific county we head to the basement. Our weather pattern has been particularly odd, in that we've been getting our severe weather warnings (thunderstorm only so far, knock wood) at night, instead of during the day. And I don't mean night like 7 pm, I mean after midnight. Doesn't really make for sweet dreams, if you know what I mean. This is the first time since we've been here that it's been like this.

This has lead to some interesting moments around here. As you know, we've been in this house less than a year, and have not had a tornado warning in that time. Well, since it's been a crazy week weather wise, we thought we should be prepared for whatever happens. The problem is our basement, which the Film Geek nicknamed the Silence of the Lambs basement when we moved in. If you've seen the movie the basement is basically a pit (literally) with crumbling walls and other gross things. We have the quinessential 1887 basement - limestone walls, partly dirt floors, spiders bigger than Miata's , name it. You even have to go through a trap-like door to get to it. Unlike the movie we have no serial killer down there, which is always a plus. There are three rooms (including a "darkroom") and even a window, but it's not a place you want to hang out for any longer than necessary. To make it amusing the window is in the "darkroom". Go figure.

Well, my husband tried to do a trial run yesterday in terms of heading to the basement if necessary and Sasquatch refused to go. You'd have to get the exact details from him, but I gather it wasn't pretty. This, of course, presents a problem. I'd like to think that if it was critical the kid would just bite the bullet and go downstairs, but who knows. I do know that if the tornado sirens are going off the last thing I want to do is have to argue with a teenager. I don't want to battle it out with him under any circumstances, but especially that one. Sometimes you just have to laugh. It beats crying any day.

Speaking of "laughing", here are two sound bites from my work weekend. I'm guessing a darker sense of humor would be needed here.

Scenario - Patient has come in with extensive facial and airway burns due to attempting to smoke a cigarette while hooked up to an oxygen tank. I'm sure the six pack that morning made it seem like a good idea. While waiting for transport to the regional burn ICU, the patients girlfriend (in a slow, slurred drawl) was telling everyone who would listen -

"Day-um, I ain't never seen nobodies head ever go up in farball like that before. Ain't somethin' ya see everyday fer sure."

And the patient's two cents?

"That's it! I'm definitely gonna stop smokin' now"

Oh god, help me. Help me to keep my mouth shut and not say "YA THINK???"

Personal note to Mom- good luck with your surgery today. It's going to go fine, little buckaroo. And just keep telling yourself it's only four weeks until the lake. I love you! xoxo


Happy in the Abyss said...

I'll say it for you...YA THINK?

How is your Mom?

Happy in the Abyss said...

Also...your page is looking pretty sweet there, sister!!!!

pursegirl said...

I'm crying! Your Alabama roots are serving you well in describing farball boy. OMG!! If we were in MO, I would ask if I was related to this fella'. Solution to Sasquatch and basement: one swift hit to the noggin' with rolling pin OR confiscate something soothing from work you can stick him with on his way down, down, down to the basement.