Monday, September 10, 2007

the last week

My husband blew into town today for a grand total of three hours and twenty minutes, bearing gifts of steaming piles of fetid laundry and a shooting schedule that has, yet again, changed for the worse. Today was his one day off this week and even though the intelligent thing for him to do would be to hang out at the hotel and get some rest, he couldn't . That silly little job he's trying to hold down here keeps getting in the way.

The location on this film is in the middle of absolutely nowhere, somewhere on a prairie somewhere in the middle of Kansas. They have no internet access. I didn't know hotels even existed anymore with no internet. The upshot, of course, is that he can't really get anything done there for his "real job" and has had to make the long haul home to get caught up on his "day off."

The shoot is having more than it's share of problems. Five weeks into a six week schedule tempers tend to run a little hot. Problems that were small three weeks ago do not look not quite as small anymore. Six days a week of sixteen to eighteen hour days has taken it's toll on everyone. The Film Geek sounds ragged, homesick, wanting this damned thing to be done. Seven more days. The countdown has begun.

It's hard to say exactly why this is such a pain. The reason it's a pain for him is pretty clear, but it's starting to wear on us at home, too. I've finally realized tonight that not only does it not help when he's here for a matter of hours, it almost makes it worse. The kids and I are in a routine when he's gone, and things go really smoothly. When he's home for this brief a time it just gets the kids all worked up. I don't have any problems with him traveling so much, as he's always done it. I manage just fine on my own, thank you very much. We've never had the kind of marriage where we're joined at the hip and feel we have to do everything together. Thank god. I see people like that where they obviously have good marriages and I think (for about six seconds) how nice it would be to do everything with your spouse and spend all your free time together and I get carried away on this train of thought until I remember that if we did that we'd be divorced. And then the whole thing would be moot.

So here I am for another week with a constant background noise of video games and arguing and people saying things like heymomcanihaveasleepoverandareweoutofchipsandithinkthedogpukedonyourbedwhycan't

and my husband is off to The Little Film Shoot on the Prairie with clean clothes and a goodie bag full of home baked chocolate chip cookies and poppyseed bread and even a handmade card that the kids made to brighten up his hotel room. Of course he's not supposed to eat any of this so if he drops dead this week I'm going to feel really bad. I would've sent steamed broccoli but it would have made his room smell really bad by Wednesday or Thursday.

On the other hand the smell might have reminded him of home.


Flowerpot said...

he's a lucky man - and those cookies and bread smell wonderful from here...

PixelPi said...

The attached at the hip thing would sure be the death of our marriage too! Luckily, Mr. Pi and I have jobs with schedules that give us plenty of breathing room. He even went on a 10-day trip to Oklahoma in August and I had a great time being alone completely alone. And he sheepishly admitted he didn't really mind his 10-days away that much, either.

But now I feel slightly guilty that I didn't send him a single batch of cookies. I think maybe I'd better learn to bake stuff. We've only been married about 20 years or so now but he deserves better than a "Hi home, you're home."

PixelPi said...

OK. That obviously should be "Hi HONEY, you're home.

Never Post Before Caffeine

laurie said... have time? time to make homemade cookies and bread? while working 12-hour shifts? while being a single mom to three kids? while running a house? while writing one of the best blogs in blogdom????

i used to like you RC. [shakes head sadly] now i am starting to hate you.....

ah not really. but man. you are efficient.

ciara said...

crikey...homemade sweets for your sweets!lol even I'M not that generous with steve lol especially as of late. i spend about 12 hours a day w/o steve @ home due to his job and commute time. and when he is home, i complain that he doesn't take an interest in anything going on once he's there. he only has 3 to 4 hours before he goes to sleep...he should make the most of them and be aware of the going-ons lol

The Rotten Correspondent said...

flowerpot - it was the kid's idea. I think they just wanted to have lots of goodies left over.

pixel pi - I think if it works for you that's great, but it would drive me nuts. And I think ten days home alone sounds fab. And, for the record, I don't think I've ever done this before and, like I said, it was the kid's idea.

So what's up with this surgery thing??

laurie - "one of the best blogs in blogdom?" Have I told you recently that I adore the ground you walk your dogs on?

And stop shaking your head sadly at me. Remember I'm on way cut back hours at work and am working ONE big 12 hour shift a WEEK. With an eight minute commute each way. Actually, to be honest, this is all the contracted hours I have, I just always pick up more. I like the flexibility and god knows, there's always hours to pick up.

I am efficient, though. Can't deny that. But no Superwoman BS in my arsenal. Honest. you like me again??

ciara - that's why I like it better when he's out of town. When he's home, even working long hours, I expect him to engage. When he's not here and I'm not expecting anything, it goes a lot smoother.

la bellina mammina said...

I really think that it's nice to take advantage of the time when your partner is away, to have the kids to yourself, to recharge and do stuff with your girlfriends. GAP is away for a few days and I always use this time to pamper myself.... and no, I don't pack homemade cookies for him. He only gets love notes in his luggage!;-)

laurie said...

aw, dang it, i love ya. you know that. thing is, we hosted my mother-in-law for lunch yesterday. i was going to bake a cake. a friend gave me a recipe for an irish whiskey cake that i have been wanting to try. should i mention that she gave me the recipe last january and i have yet to make it?

but between cleaning the house, racing around trying to find sweet corn slightly out of season, exercising, and showering, i ran out of time.

bought a lovely chocolate cake at the grocery store that was better (and prettier) than anything i could have made myself.

i tell myself that whiskey cake wouldn't have been appropriate anyway for an old lady...

next time, though, i'm calling you. you can fed-ex me some of those cookies.

The Rotten Correspondent said...

bella - my husband would trade both the cookies and the cake for a love note. Trust me.

laurie - see, you've just mentioned things I don't do..
sweet corn out of season...nope
shower...okay, you got me on that one
but only in months with an R.

The Rotten Correspondent said...

OH, and cleaning the house...NOPE!

Mya said...

I jolly well hope you ironed and starched all that clean laundry too, oh superwoman!

Mya x

The Rotten Correspondent said...

Mya - HA! and double HA! My dear husband doesn't trust me with his laundry. Something about an incident years ago when his shirts got shrunk when I put them in the wrong temp water. He said he'd do his own laundry from then on. And he basically has. However could I make such a mistake? heh.

Diana said...

There's feeding the body and then there's feeding the soul. The goodies you sent with him will feed his soul, and some would say that this will do him more good than all the steamed veggies in the world.

Sweet Irene said...

You're a sweetheart for providing him with chocolate chip cookies and poppy seed cake, how much better can it get. And clean laundry on top of that! My husband and I are almost joined at the hip, but we separate just in time and do our own thing. We aren't too together, but close enough. I would miss him if he were out all of the time, but then I don't have a large pack of amusing children around the house anymore. I remember that in the past that took care of the loneliness issues. Now I would miss him too much. He is my true companion and life saver when I comes to spending not so many lonely nights in bed. I am sure your husband's absences make your heart grow all the fonder of him, don't they? Bake him lots of goodies! It shows you love him a lot even when it isn't quite good for his health!

Akelamalu said...

I suggest you do the love notes in the luggage next time he goes away and save the bother of making the cookes! That way you're not only giving him a thrill you'll be looking after his health too! :)

Jo Beaufoix said...

Ooo I'm late to the party superwoman.

Those cookies look yum.

I once tried to bake some biscuits and they were like bricks.

Me and Mr B get on well but would want to kill each other if we were together all day everyday.
I mean, when would you have time to moan about each other?

Hope the Film Geek's last 7 days shooting are quick and easy.

wakeupandsmellthecoffee said...

Aren't you a Good Wife! My hubby works in London all week, comes home with dirty laundry at the weekends. I don't bake cookies for him. He wouldn't eat them anyway. He turns our routine upside down as well. But I let him come home anyway

The Rotten Correspondent said...

diana - I'm sure he'd be the first one to tell you that his soul much prefers sweets over fiber.

sweet irene - oh, all right. I do miss him just a little.

akelamalu - yeah, but think of how much time it would take me to make good on the love notes...

jo - exactly my point. How can I trash him if he's always here??

wakeup - I swear it's the first time I've ever baked him cookies. I swear!

Jen said...

It's interesting, your marriage sounds a bit like my mom and dad's. Dad travelled almost two days out of the year for a long time, and we all kind of got into a rhythm.

And maybe that's why my husband and I are practically joined at the hip. When we first met, we spent eight hours a day together. Then we started dating and moved in together, so we were almost literally together 24 hrs a day. When we weren't anymore, it was strange. It's better now, but I miss seeing him, and being able to tell him something, just whenever.

Since you're baking cookies, could you send some my way? It'll take my mind of my craving for pie.

code: cybjzbq See, why be jazz back? I dunno. Why?

The Rotten Correspondent said...

What kind of pie do you want, oh great pregnant one?

Kaycie said...

I'm a stay at home mom so there are always goodies around our house. If it weren't for hubby's work, we'd be together all the time, save for shopping and golf with his buddies. I like it that way. My parents hardly see each other through the week and they're happy that way. Each to his own, right?

Jen said...

LOL, I've been wanting peach pie, but the peach crop here died on the trees. I've been dealing with Mrs. Smiths. Not the same, but I take what I can get. Now that we live 15 minutes from the nearest grocery, there will be no midnight pie runs for my husband.

Jen said...

Oh, and my first post should have said "Dad travelled two HUNDRED days out of the year." Not two. My mother would have killed him if he'd been home 363 days in a row.

code: many cows you got living nearby?