I want to go to the gym, but I can't because Sasquatch left my iPod earbuds over at a friend's house and I refuse to get on the treadmill without them.
I want to start getting out of the house more and shaking up my routine a little (or a lot), but when it comes time to actually put the effort into it I can't seem to muster any energy.
I want to be able to go to the public pool with the kids this summer and not have to wear a muu muu, but the local market is having a 3 for $10 sale on ice cream and I have a new deep freeze, so you do the math.
I want to be aggravated and jumping out of my skin when I have to be at work, and relaxed and calm when I get to be at home, instead of the other way around.
I want to know why, speaking of work, that I have become such a hot topic of conversation lately. I really do love to fly under the radar in the flight plan of life, and this has got my rudders in a twist.
I want to know why Sasquatch seems to feel that a good report card is the sign of a tragic life.
I want to know how the three foot long snake ended up in our trauma room at three in the morning, and while I'm at it I want to know why one of the docs felt compelled to pick it up and chase the nurses around the unit with it.
I want to know why I'm not more perked up by the fact that both George Clooney and Bill Murray appear to be back on the market this week, since I'm sure they'd both adore me if only they had a chance. (And if I laid off the mint chip).
I want something - anything - to go the way I want it to go and not take a sudden, unexpected curve.
I want to know - is that asking too much?
Friday, May 30, 2008
Posted by the rotten correspondent at 12:02 AM