Wednesday, May 21, 2008

night shift

My dogs may be lazy, but they're not stupid. They've somehow figured out a way to keep me awake the maximum number of hours a night with the least amount of effort from them. How have they done this? By specializing.



Dee Dee will bark at any animal, no matter how small, who happens to pass by, but once they're gone she feels she's done her dogly duties and she flops back to sleep with a completely clear conscience.


Isaiah takes the baton if there are any traffic noises or sirens. His hound dog ears pick up the slightest screech of brakes or a fire truck six miles away, but once they wind down so does he. Confident that the house is safe from runaway squad cars, he settles down to his true nighttime passion - noxious emissions.


Trixie barks at the wind, leaves falling off the trees and the sound of a toilet flushing across town. She takes her alpha dog status seriously, protecting the house against the refrigerator when it cycles on and the little old lady sneezing down the street.


At any given time - all night long - there are two dogs snoring and one dog going ballistic. They wake up in the morning well rested and ready to face the day.


I wish I could say the same.

17 comments:

ped crossing said...

Have you considered giving them children's benedryl so they sleep through the night. Or put one in each boys room. To keep them safe.

I feel for you, sleep is the be all, end all of my existence.

Maggie May said...

Oh that would mean a trip to the vets to have the offender put down!
No, no no! I didn't say that! Didi I?

the mother of this lot said...

It must be nice to feel so protected! You called a dog Isaiah?

girl with the mask said...

I guess you can't fault them for being smart enough to have a system- annoying as it may be!

Nora said...

I suppose they wouldn't consider sleeping with the boys, would they?

Our dog is very quiet at night, so I can't empathize.

It is awful, though, to have interrupted sleep and I know you need yours more than anybody.

Maybe you should try the benedryl.

the planet of janet said...

ugh. my rat dogs go outside and bark at the air. we lock them up.

i'm thinking the benedryl isn't such a bad idea.....

Rudee said...

Perhaps they arouse you to be sure all is really safe so they can get some shut eye.

aims said...

My cat keeps me awake. Always wanting under the blankets - hogging the pillow - kissing my face - purring. I think 4 hours is my max. I don't know what she'll do when I get the CPAP machine.

aims said...

And for you - earplugs.

Eileen said...

Gotta love dogs. They love you and the boys so much, they share the nightly guard duties. Sounds like they have it down to a Science. I bet you would not trade them for anything!
XOXOXO

Aoj & The Lurchers said...

I would say "welcome to my world" but..ermm...you're already in it aren't you?

menopausaloldbag (MOB) said...

Muzzle the little suckers! No really, my two do the same but on the whole they sleep all night and it's just early morning when they get verbal.

Akelamalu said...

Get some ear plugs honey or give the dogs a sleeping tablet each!

Nearlydawn said...

I could make you some cozy slippers and a nice warm wrap if you want to send them my way...

No, just kidding, I know you love your puppies. But, I'm sure the thought has crossed your mind once or twice, eh? :)

I would probably keep things handy to throw at said puppies - soft, yet weighty things. Oh, or a squirt gun. I used these to deter my cats from their nightime frolics that involved my abdomen. That and their wailing when their food bowl went close to empty.

What have you tried to quiet them??

WT said...

Now that's what I call teamwork!!!

Wisewebwoman said...

I love the way they've got the aural alarm gauge figured out between the three of them.
But you sure need your sleep - I'd parcel them out to the boys.
XO
WWW

Carolyn said...

This is why I don't have pets. And if I did have pets they wouldn't be in my room disturbing my sleep. That's for sure. Nothing gets between me and my sleep.

Gosh. I even thought about getting rid of Csilla once... she was really ruining my sleep for a while.

(I kid. I'm a kidder.)

Get some earplugs dear! (LOL at WT).