My poor kids are not having an easy time. And it's manifesting itself in ways that are both completely expected and totally...not.
Sasquatch, who I expected to retreat to his room and not come out until Christmas, has been very open with me about his feelings and emotions.
Gumby, who I expected to be kind of clingy and weepy, has been sort of standoffish and more than a little mouthy.
Surfer Dude, who I expected to rant and rage, has steadfastly refused - tears in his eyes - to talk about the situation at all.
So much for my superhero mind reading powers.
Then we have the intangibles and the soundtrack.
Sasquatch will be turning sixteen next Sunday and has been obsessively planning his party for a week.
Gumby has been on a building jag and has created a kind of whip out of a light saber handle and a multi-colored jump rope.
Surfer Dude went to a birthday party over the weekend and got one of those heavy rubber balloons on a rubber band that you bounce against your hand. I'm very familiar with the sound, because he's also gotten really clingy and follows me from room to room.
It's Spring Break. And we're all here. And when I say we're all here...I mean we're all here. (Until we figure out what to do with the house the FG is out in the studio). So this is what I hear all day-
Gumby: (cracking the whip). Snap! Snap! Ow! (when he accidentally hits someone) Yelp! (when he accidentally hits a slow dog) You jerk! (when he nails one of his brothers on purpose). Snap!
Surfer Dude: (hitting the balloon). Wham! Wham! Wham! Do you want to come and sit with me, mom? Wham! Wham! Are you in the bathroom? Wham! Wham! Do you want to make pancakes? Wham! Wham!
Sasquatch:(obsessing) Do you think twelve kids is too much for the sleepover (Wham! Wham! Snap! Yelp!) because we had ten last year and it seemed to go okay (You jerk!) and everyone is bringing their TV's and gaming systems (Snap! Snap!) and you don't even need to buy food because if you'll just give me money (Yelp!) we'll walk to the store and buy snacks and is Tuesday okay with you (If you don't put that blessed thing down right this instant I'm going to have a nervous breakdown!) oh wait so and so will be out of town on Tuesday (Wham! Wham!) how about Wednesday no wait a minute Wednesday isn't good either (You jerk!) so what do you think I should do? Snap!
I think Snap! has a nice ring to it, don't you?
Tuesday, March 18, 2008
Posted by the rotten correspondent at 12:02 AM